Just Because You Can, Does Not Mean You Should

I met with a college friend and she seems very frustrated and furious, so I asked her why and she started telling me stories that left me in awe.

“I have a tenured co-worker who I really look up to ever since I started working. He is good-looking, street smart or clever I should say. He excels in everything he does way better than everybody else, good job, great life and the best dad to her daughter. He inspired a lot with his words, beliefs, credibility, and point of view. He can do and say anything he wants with his big mouth, and that includes toying with weak, vulnerable women who believe in him.

He knows he can easily make them women fall in love with him, so he was given the privilege to play with their body over and over, take advantage of their fragility and stage up a make-believe senseless relationship. And one of them was a friend. She was hopeful and so in love with a man who only thought of breaking her soul by consuming everything she can give. She had scars, tangible and intangible ones. Now she’s doing her best to cover her beautiful face with a smile that speaks a thousand words to those who know what happened and to those who doesn’t know a thing. For them, all she ever was, is a woman who got played and who’s willing to be played over and over again.

He did it because he knows he can.

Just because he can take advantage of women, doesn’t mean he should.

Here’s a batchmate who’s beautiful, gentle, innocent and smart. It’s just that she just can’t adapt to our chaotic environment and everyday complex scenarios in the office. But she’s trying to do her best, our co-workers don’t want to work with her because they think she’s slow and bossy. She’s the non-confrontational one, she chooses to just listen and sit up quietly when people are badmouthing her. Nobody likes her, a few does but most of them don’t. She eats by herself, goes home by alone, fights silent battles all on her own.

And here’s a tenure co-worker, she’s a nice friend, a funny one and an inspiration to some because of her strong personality. She’s very straightforward and tactless that can speak through people’s soul despite the uneasiness of the situation. She can say anything she wants, anything under the sun, people respect her because she was above all. She was given authority. She was given the privilege to say words that can impose discipline, promote happiness and the freedom to belittle those who she thinks are nothing but worthless people. One of her most favorite was a friend. She’s flabbergasted with her entire existence, she made sure to make her point clear that my friend was a fool, non-intellectual and a good-for-nothing individual.

She can badmouth my friend because everybody hates her and nobody will be mad at her because she’s superior to most.”

Just because she can belittle everybody she likes, doesn’t mean she should.

These thoughts break my heart, I am not perfect. I say bad things about people, I hurt people’s feelings, even with those who have an emotional stronghold of being weak. I am sarcastic. I can say whenever I want to people I hate the most because I have a choice and I know that I can do it. But just because I can do it, doesn’t mean I will do it.

Who am I to question, disrespect and belittle these people?

Aren’t we all the same? Will pointing fingers make us more of a person? A human being, regardless of their social status, spend an entire lifetime to build up their confidence just to be emotionally capable to handle the world’s curious, complex crisis. They have a million questions to the world. How will they adapt to the world? Will their job give them fame? Will their relationship give them stability? Who are these feel-so-good people to question you?

She cried her heart out feeling sorry for those who were abused, censured, ostracized and left alone. No one understands how they truly feel, the world just makes things worst by mocking these people and making them believe that what happened to them is acceptable.

Here’s to those people who felt less loved because of individuals who thought of themselves as gods,

Love yourself more. Let the demeaning words and sufferings be your bread and butter in this lifetime. You might think that God is a bit overboard but He’s a man of wisdom, He doesn’t give you challenges you cannot resolve.

Be a lesson to others, be their salt and light. Don’t let people patronize the discrediting of others’ existence. Do not feel bad about yourself. Walk with your head up high and let people respect your individuality. Do not let other people maltreat your weakness, instead let it be your strongest attribute to face those who think highly of themselves by breaking the frail ones.

They’re coward people who cannot exist without being intimidated and live their life by proving themselves worthy by stepping down on other people. Surround yourselves with good friends, read books, eat great food and pray. 

To those who feel superior and excellence,

God bless you.

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